Poor poor Capitan Poopypants was worse throughout the day yesterday. After his mid-day nap we took him to a walk-in clinic to see a doctor and his ear infection has returned as well as the discharge from his eyes. He also has a fever of 103F. Poor little dude.

So, he’s home from daycare today (again) with his gramps and grammy. Luckily we have a backup or my work would be just losing it about now. I think this is the fourth time since September, when I returned to work, that he’s been home. In eight weeks of daycare, he’s missed 4 days because of being sick. I knew it would be bad when he went into a centre, but this bad.
Mike and I have never really been people to be sick either, we’ve always been the kinda people that get sick and wait it out and deal with it. Avoid doctors. But now we’re getting everything; I have been sick with this damn cold for 2 weeks now and just getting over it. Still avoiding going to the doctor for myself, but just can’t do that for a 14 month old. Maybe if he was older I would tell him to suck it up, but I just can’t at this age.

The worst is knowing that you’re child is sick and in pain and there be nothing you can do to take that away. You can cuddle until you’re blue in the face, but that doesn’t relieve the ear ache and doesn’t take the cough away. I never thought that I would feel so helpless and out of control in these situations.

When he woke last night, I sat with him in the rocking chair and just watched him as he drifted in and out of sleep. I began tearing up (okay, weeping) thinking that I have to just sit here and watch my baby be in pain and there really is nothing I can do. I can try and keep him comfortable, but aside from that, I am at a loss. That’s, I think, one of the worst feelings I’ve experienced so far.