Denise at Mental Excrements has been doing “Fuck Off And Die” Thursday’s in light of her recent “troubles” with UPS (which, by the way, you can just shake your head at. What a bunch of asses.). So I had a FOAD day today, and didn’t want to wait until Thursday.
*Those that may be sensitive to the f-bombs, consider this your warning.
Dear Gas Pump. FOAD.
I swiped my card two times and entered the correct pin, yet you tell me that I have an error. I know that it’s the right number and I know that it was entered correctly. Fuck you very much for making me get into my car and move to another pump because you can’t reset yourself.
Dear Man in the Ritzy car. FOAD.
Just because you drive a Bentley doesn’t mean that you don’t have to wait like the rest of us. We all wait for our chance to get on the highway and you damn well should to. WTF? You think that you’re sooo much better? Oh, and thank you for trying to cut me off too. Asshole.
Dear Parking Attendant. FOAD.
Yes, I realize that you’re busy, but you can forget about thinking I’m going to let you double park my car and hold on to my keys as well as pay a 40 dollar deposit so that I can park in your lot. And you think I’m a bitch because I say no and want to turn around? Fuck off and die.
Dear Collection Agency. FOAD.
Thank you for your your gracious letter allowing us to pay 82% of the total amount of my husband’s outstanding debt (another post all together). But please, let your punk ass agents know that when I call to pay that amount, I am not willing to tack on extra charges for incurred interests and that it’s past the date for the “without prejudice” when is BOLD it says that tomorrow is that deadline. I refuse to be talked to like I am a child and will not tolerate when someone tries to bully me over the phone. I WILL give attitude right back, and dammit, I will win.
Thank you for accepting the payment that I said I would authorize, and not a cent more. Now, FUCK OFF AND DIE.
And my dear husband. I love you very much, but FOAD. Why do you let stupid bills go without paying them and then have a collections agency call us? Do you have any concept of the fact that this. is. not. good. for. our. credit. rating.? Get it through your fucking head. How old are you, 10? FUCK!
To the site that I am working on. The stairs. They can FOAD too. I realize that it’s necessary to be able to get from the bottom of the excavation to the top. But this is ridiculous! 86 stairs, and I have to go up and down at least 6 times a day. Count ‘em; that’s 516 steps. *sigh*
Oh, and K-Fed. FOAD.
I will say that you’ve got balls. Using a sex tape to swindle millions of dollars out of your soon-to-be ex. Smart. Isn’t that blackmail though? And isn’t that illegal? Yet for some reason, you do it publicly and just might get away with it because Britney thinks she has a “wholesome image” to uphold. Geez woman, we’re not fuckin’ morons.
I feel better. *grin*
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