May 8th, 2007
Lately I have been thinking a lot about my will, actually, my lack there of. Neither Mike or myself have a Last Will and Testament, not that big a deal; most people our age don’t. But for Carter’s sake, I think we need one. You know, guardianship and all that jazz.
Mike thinks I’m too negative. Why do you have to talk like that? he says. Geez, sorry I was thinking about our child’s future should something happen to us. How irresponsible of me.
I think that’s the only thing that I want to stipulate - who raises my child besides the loyal boob tube TV box, who is doing a great job by the way. It may be time for a raise. That is a feat in itself. Who to choose? My parents? Fun! I know I had a great time. (Did I ooze some sarcasm on you? Sorry. My bad.) My brother? Great, beer for breakfast! (Love you!) Mike’s family, whom we haven’t spoken to in YEARS? Ha.
So for now, The Loyal Boob Tube has the lead.
Seriously.
Oh, and The Dog goes with The Boy.
Besides Carter I guess the only other thing I would want to add is that I’d rather be cremated instead of buried. I can’t handle the thought of bugs all over me. Spiders in my ears, dining on earwax. Ick. The thought of it even makes me feel all squimish. (My spell checker says it’s wrong. I say fuck you Spell Checker, you’re stupid.)
All my stuff (read: DEBT)? I don’t care. People can take what they want and sell the rest; I won’t need it where I’m going (Hey, you think there’s room in that hand basket for me?). I always thought that if I had an incurable disease or something like that, I would sell everything and run like a bat out of hell (or into hell), shop until I drop, do all the fun things I’ve been telling Mike we can’t afford (like buying a can of fried beans or day old donuts). What fun!
Then I read the story about this sorry ass. Wouldn’t that suck a big one? Sell everything you have, default on your mortgage, only to find out you’re healthy. What’s that poor bastard thinking now? I’ll tell ya. Them sonsabitches! They said I’m as good as dead, they’s gonna pay for it all, dammit! I’d probably try and stick it to them too.
Could you imagine! If it were me, I’d probably shit twice and then die anyway. Muthafucka!
Shit twice and then die anyway….. LMAO!!!
May 8th, 2007 at 9:14 pm
Oh my! I have been contemplating the same thing–at least one of my monster is raised and the other is just a few years away, but David? My sister I guess, maybe my mom.
And I am with you…if I ever get the bad news I am spending my final days on a travelling tour delux!
May 8th, 2007 at 10:34 pm
You are hilarious and my neighbors probably think I’m nuts hooting loudly at your writing. I checked out the Brit version of the guy who cashed in his chips…Yah, I always figured I’d go out that way. Oops. Nevermind.
May 9th, 2007 at 1:07 pm
Wow - what an unbelievable story! Can you say live and learn??
May 9th, 2007 at 1:14 pm
Oh — I forgot to tell you I tagged you and linked you for a meme today. It’s an easy one. Just thought I’d share your sense of humor. You can kick my ass later if you hate that sort of thing.
May 9th, 2007 at 1:40 pm
still can’t comment on your newest posts…
i can’t believe you sucked up a mouse! and lived to tell about it! ack!
May 10th, 2007 at 10:07 am
Personally, I do think it’s a big deal…I think once you have kids, as much as it sucks to think about dying, you have to set something up in order to make sure they are under the care of who you want them to be. I’ve talked to so many people who think that because they have godparents for their children, they have legal guardians for them — but from what I understand, a godparent isn’t a legal guardian. Both Dave and I have Wills set up, with a legal guardian who is *not* a godparent set up in case something ever happened to both of us.
Sucks to think about, but I think it’s important.
Love the ‘Sixteen Candles’ reference.
May 10th, 2007 at 4:11 pm
I’ve also been thinking about getting a will. We also have to figure out who would be guardians of our kids. It’s a hard decision.
May 14th, 2007 at 9:43 am