June 14th, 2007
This just in! *Apparently* Shar Jackson is pregnant with K-Fed’s baby. Again. Though they are both denying these “rumours”, Shar’s said to be 8 weeks pregnant with the couples third child.
Now, you may or may not agree. But K-Fed is brilliant. Whether he knows it or not.
This is how I see it:
K-Fed and Shar are struggling out-of-work performers. K-Fed, an unknown backup dancer, Shar, a down and out actress. They have no more then a couple dimes they can rub together and two children, who are in need of basic necessities. K-Fed has a plan. Find a rich girl who can give him some money to support his fam.
[cue Britney Spears]
Horny and rich as hell, Britney falls for the K-Fed charm (excuse me, I just barfed a little in my mouth). They get together, and have wild monkey sex that they tape and then make a TV show out of (remember Chaotic? Yeah, me neither). But K-fed has an obstacle - dum-dum-dum… the prenuptial agreement. How will he ever be able to get his grubby hands on her money now!?
[cue kids]
So their wild monkey taped sex results in a couple children. K-Fed then convinces Brit-brit to let loose and enjoy life. After all she can’t uphold the innocent virgin persona now with a couple kids right? She then has some drinks, party it up with the likes of Hollywood’s trashiest - Paris and Lindsay.
[cue Crazy Britney]
The woman falls off her rocker and goes completely nuts. After all those years of her goodie goodie image, she’s damn near lost her mind!
[cue Divorce and Custody Battle]
K-Fed then tells Crazy Britney that she needs to clean up her act or he’s taking the kids away from her. BUT he will settle for a small (read: ridiculously HUGE) payout and she can keep the brats. Throw in a stay at Promises Rehab facility to make it look legit.
[cue The Infamous Haircut]
K-Fed walks away with millions. Britney is FUBAR (fucked up beyond all recognition - for real) with two kids and only mere shreds of a career left. K-Fed then returns to Shar, with millions in tow and they live happily ever after. Oh, and have ANOTHER kid.
See.
Shear brilliance. I couldn’t have planned it better myself.
Brit-Brit: “I was Punked!”
would make a fantastic made-for-tv movie
June 14th, 2007 at 10:45 am
That guy must either have a *serious* package, or a greaet voodoo priestess throwing chicken blood all over LA on his behalf. I wouldn’t even look at a guy like that, yet he bags & impregnates celebrities on a daily basis! What the hell!
June 14th, 2007 at 10:52 am
I hadn’t thought about it like that before… Brilliant! Who woulda thunk that ol’ K-Fed was the brains behind the operation?
June 14th, 2007 at 11:45 am
Damn, your good! That’s a drama I would go see LOL
June 14th, 2007 at 12:35 pm
Hmmmm (rubbing chin) Very interesting. This is all starting to make sense….
June 14th, 2007 at 12:40 pm
Yes, you are right, and Shar is now on that divorce show, I actually like it! She’s pretty cool. Although I don’t think all of this was intentional, (but then again who really know’s in Hollywood?!), it sure did work-out to their benefit, at least for now. Although their publicist’s are vehemently denying the 3rd pregnancy rumour’s, I too do believe that it is true! Wow, what is it now? 5 kid’s all by the age of about 25? Jeez!
June 14th, 2007 at 1:22 pm
the way you decribed it, made me want to see it in a movie LOL
June 14th, 2007 at 3:37 pm
Wow, I never thought about it like that. Perhaps he’s less of a moron that I thought.
But he’s still an ass.
June 14th, 2007 at 8:33 pm
Yes, brilliant indeed.
Oh yeah, and I think I tagged you here:
http://sugarbunss.blogspot.com/2007/06/like-virgin.html
June 14th, 2007 at 10:14 pm
Hey did you make that up? Never heard that conspiracy theory before.
I think YOU are brilliant SAM!
June 14th, 2007 at 11:08 pm
Brilliant. You my friend are a code cracker. You should work for the government.
June 15th, 2007 at 12:09 am
What is WITH that guy? Why does anyone sleep with him? Oh right, because their skanky ho’s who just happen to have money. Yep, you’re right on, methinks.
June 15th, 2007 at 1:32 am