August 10th, 2007
This world is too fast. Days are a blur and before I know it, my cuddly and lovable toddler with separation anxiety with be a teenager; so full of angst and hatred for his parents (because honestly, who does hate their parents at some time?). Sooner then later he will be in school, high school, college, married.
It’s all too fast.
Modern day life is all about status. How much you have, how much you work and what you can show for it. Life has inevitably become live to work; instead work to live. With not enough hours in the day, we are forced to work earlier, commute longer and spend less time together. Family time in then reserved for the weekend, provided they are not filled with other obligations.
Mike and I both work in the very demanding field of construction. Be it, different parts, it’s the same industry. An industry that doesn’t quit, doesn’t slow and definitely doesn’t put family first. But. We do. We try. We were are not people to let our career choices dictate our personal lives. We are not afraid to speak up and refuse work that will take us away for months, we will do what we have to for our family unit.
Work is just that. Work.
It’s not love, it’s not memories, it’s not family. It will never in any way, shape or form, replace the warmth and love of seeing a smile form on my son’s face or hearing his hearty belly laugh.
And though we spend our days away from each other and even some nights; nights were work has worn us thin and all we want to do is be alone, we are family. We are love. We are constant.
Weekends have become cherished jewels in the midst of the hectic rat race. Weekends are our only time to get lost in each other; for the world’s pace to slow, for us to drink in everything that’s been missed over the proceeding five days.
Weekends are ours.
Should it be time spent completing errands, family trips or lazying around the house, we do it together. Lazing around the backyard or tipping our umpteenth Lego building while we relax in our pajamas, we do it together.
Weekends are about our little family.
Yet, some don’t understand. They don’t understand our wants, our needs, for our family time. They take it upon themselves to guilt us into obligations we don’t want. They guilt us for not spending time with them while demanding that we can always have family time and we should be out and having fun. Granted, being out sans children can be exhilarating sometimes, it’s not without guilt. The guilt that sticks like honey. The guilt that your child has spent so many hours in a daycare, without his parents, eats away at practically all hope of enjoying an evening.
The math of a 5 day work week is stifling.
55 out of 120 hours Carter is in daycare.
15 hours we spend together from Monday to Friday.
Fifteen hours. That’s it. Of course I want my weekends to be with my family.
:::
This post is brought to you in conjunction with Parent Bloggers Network’s Blog Blast! & EA’s Wii-Boogie, a family gaming experience. Shake it. Sing it. Create it.
What are your favorite family activities and how do you find the quality family time?
And if you don’t have quality family time, how do you make up for it? What challenges do you face?
Write your post on the topic above on Friday, August 10 (anytime before midnight PST) and make sure to link back to Parent Bloggers Network as well as Wii-Boogie for your chance to be entered in the draw for a Nintendo Wii and a copy of the new game “Boggie”.
** Cross posted at Viable Vixen **
I LOVE this post! You hit a chord with me because we’ve been going through the same thing…family and friends trying to make plans on the weekends and getting bummed at us if we say “no” we’re just chillin’ this weekend, just us!
Thanks for reminding me that it’s okay, and to take the time for what’s truly most important!
August 10th, 2007 at 8:42 am
Oh, I SO get it, Sam… And you know what? I’m a “stay-at-home” mum (well, I work here, actually).
Even when you’re home, the guilt still hangs over your head that you spend too much time working, cooking, cleaning, dragging your little ones out on errands… when you SHOULD just drop everything and PLAY.
People who say to me, “Just let it all GO!!” drive me nuts– it’s just not possible to let it go without all the wheels falling off of the little red wagon that is my delicately-balanced life!!
I try– I really do try– to spend good quality time with my kids having fun during the week, but it’s on the weekends, when my husband is around to help out with the household duties, that we’re able to relax together.
The other weekend, I told my girlies that we were going to have “Family Alone Time”, spend it all in the garden and in the pool, and NOT ANSWER THE PHONE FOR ANYONE!!
My three girls all gasped!! No PHONE??!
“Even if it’s GRAMMA??!” asked Child Number One.
“ESPECIALLY if it’s Gramma…” I replied.
Sometimes it’s just NECESSARY to detatch from the rest of the world.
I’ve never been happier with call display.
And even when I’m home, I’ve dedicated myself to blog designs and reviews and other stuff that I try and break it up over the weekend so I don’t spend too much time here.. nap time is great for that!
As long as we have time together and I get him helping with chores (cuz I’m a slave driver already) I feel better that we’re doing something together!
August 10th, 2007 at 8:52 am
I totally get this.
We’ve started booking weekends where we say we’re busy but actually have no plans. We block them out on the calendar. It’s the only way.
That’s a good idea! I like that - except, I would book every single weekend.
August 10th, 2007 at 9:13 am
Yikes!!! When you do the math, it’s scary how very little time there is.
Yes, you have to make it a PRIORITY!!
Yeah, the math totally freaked me out.
15 whole hours. How bad is that? Gah!
August 10th, 2007 at 12:21 pm
What a great post!
Jenn
Thank you!!
I try (sometimes).
August 10th, 2007 at 4:21 pm
I get it, I totally get it. Now I wish Buns did… you are my Friday hero.
*gushing* really? Friday Hero? Now that’s something I’ve never been called before.
I like it!
August 10th, 2007 at 7:10 pm
SO true! And although I love summer, at least in the winter people aren’t up my butt as much. They don’t expect you to go too far when you’re snowed in. Heh.
Well, it’s always been busy with us… since having Carter and him being so young still… I hope it slows down more the older he gets!
August 10th, 2007 at 9:56 pm
Oh, and your new design rocks!
August 10th, 2007 at 9:57 pm
Awesome post. Don’t let ANYONE ever guilt you into working more or going out without the kids if that’s not what you want. At the end of the day, you will feel more guilt if you do what other people want or expect rather than what your heart tells you to do.
You’re a good mama. Stick to your guns!
Thanks!
It’s so hard to fight the guilt and begging family/friends! So hard!!
August 11th, 2007 at 3:51 am