Comments on: From Behind the Facade http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/ Rocking the boat since 1981. Tue, 31 Jan 2012 22:49:22 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3 By: Temporarily Me in Toronto at Canada Blog Friends http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-7630 Temporarily Me in Toronto at Canada Blog Friends Thu, 23 Jul 2009 02:51:50 +0000 http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-7630 [...] I marveled at the honesty and the bravery of her self documentation – she had the courage to step out from behind the façade and face reality in confessional writing that becomes the ultimate public self exploration. The [...] [...] I marveled at the honesty and the bravery of her self documentation – she had the courage to step out from behind the façade and face reality in confessional writing that becomes the ultimate public self exploration. The [...]

]]> By: Al_Pal http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-7092 Al_Pal Tue, 16 Jun 2009 11:29:42 +0000 http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-7092 Heh. I forgot that I had commented here before... since then, we got engaged. ;p We've actually been talking about some really deep stuff recently. Relationships are an adventure, for sure. ;p Heh. I forgot that I had commented here before… since then, we got engaged. ;p
We’ve actually been talking about some really deep stuff recently. Relationships are an adventure, for sure. ;p

]]> By: Al_Pal http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-6434 Al_Pal Fri, 03 Apr 2009 05:41:42 +0000 http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-6434 Oof. Seems like you are doing better now, and I'm glad for that. Courageous post, and yes, one that more people need to see this type of to feel less alone! I'm very fortunate in that while my partnerMan and I are both passionate, we're also pretty mellow and not prone to fighting. Happily unmarried & no kids which makes things a helluva lot easier. We fight sometimes, but it is pretty darned rare! We are scared of the negative impact that marriage could have on our relationship. Who knows. I don't like to put too much out in public, but if you want to follow up by email that is fine. :P Good Luck! Oof. Seems like you are doing better now, and I’m glad for that.
Courageous post, and yes, one that more people need to see this type of to feel less alone!
I’m very fortunate in that while my partnerMan and I are both passionate, we’re also pretty mellow and not prone to fighting. Happily unmarried & no kids which makes things a helluva lot easier. We fight sometimes, but it is pretty darned rare! We are scared of the negative impact that marriage could have on our relationship. Who knows. I don’t like to put too much out in public, but if you want to follow up by email that is fine. :P

Good Luck!

]]> By: Chicky Chicky Baby http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2949 Chicky Chicky Baby Fri, 14 Mar 2008 01:39:10 +0000 http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2949 As someone who has been there before and decided on divorce let me tell you that divorce is the last thing you want if it can be avoided. Try the counseling first. If for some reason things still don't work out (and I'm keeping all my fingers crossed for you that everything gets better) you can at least say you tried. <em>Chicky Chicky Baby's last blog post..<a href='http://chickychickybaby.blogspot.com/2008/03/chicky-is-punk.html'>Chicky is a Punk</a></em> As someone who has been there before and decided on divorce let me tell you that divorce is the last thing you want if it can be avoided. Try the counseling first. If for some reason things still don’t work out (and I’m keeping all my fingers crossed for you that everything gets better) you can at least say you tried.

Chicky Chicky Baby’s last blog post..Chicky is a Punk

]]> By: Jennifer http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2947 Jennifer Thu, 13 Mar 2008 19:30:12 +0000 http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2947 I wish I could write this EXACT post on my blog. This is my life. I'm sorry it's hard for you right now, too. <em>Jennifer's last blog post..<a href='http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2008/03/13/how-do-cable-companies-get-away-with-telling-us-theyll-be-there-between-8-and-never/'>How Do Cable Companies Get Away With Telling Us They’ll Be There Between 8 and Never</a></em> I wish I could write this EXACT post on my blog.

This is my life.

I’m sorry it’s hard for you right now, too.

Jennifer’s last blog post..How Do Cable Companies Get Away With Telling Us They’ll Be There Between 8 and Never

]]> By: ali http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2928 ali Wed, 12 Mar 2008 20:41:17 +0000 http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2928 hugs, hon. it was so very brave to write this post. marriage is TOUGH. it's SO tough. and no one likes to talk about the shitty parts. <em>ali's last blog post..<a href='http://www.alimartell.com/index.php/2008/03/12/no-pressure-no-problem-no-service/'>no pressure, no problem, no service?</a></em> hugs, hon. it was so very brave to write this post.
marriage is TOUGH. it’s SO tough. and no one likes to talk about the shitty parts.

ali’s last blog post..no pressure, no problem, no service?

]]> By: How it all started. « Justmylife-mygripespot’s Weblog http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2927 How it all started. « Justmylife-mygripespot’s Weblog Wed, 12 Mar 2008 18:05:46 +0000 http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2927 [...] by justmylifemygripespot I read a post yesterday that got me to thinking, you can find it here ( http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/ ). (One of these days I will learn that neat trick where you can “hide” the link, but [...] [...] by justmylifemygripespot I read a post yesterday that got me to thinking, you can find it here ( http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/ ). (One of these days I will learn that neat trick where you can “hide” the link, but [...]

]]> By: samarama ding dong http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2914 samarama ding dong Wed, 12 Mar 2008 14:32:13 +0000 http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2914 <strong>Brenda:</strong> Thank you Brenda! That really means a lot. And I remember some of the hard times that you shared between you and your husband. I remember how it was for you during those years of infertility. I'm really glad that things are back on track for you!! <strong>Shania: </strong>Ya, I've said that FAR too many times. But when I actually think about it. I know I don't mean it. It's not that I can't survive financially or as a single parent.. it's him. I'd actually miss him because when it's good - it's really good...and I know it would be FAR to hard on our son (who's nearing 3 yr). Brenda: Thank you Brenda! That really means a lot. And I remember some of the hard times that you shared between you and your husband. I remember how it was for you during those years of infertility. I’m really glad that things are back on track for you!!

Shania: Ya, I’ve said that FAR too many times. But when I actually think about it. I know I don’t mean it. It’s not that I can’t survive financially or as a single parent.. it’s him. I’d actually miss him because when it’s good – it’s really good…and I know it would be FAR to hard on our son (who’s nearing 3 yr).

]]> By: Shania http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2912 Shania Wed, 12 Mar 2008 14:26:04 +0000 http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2912 Thank you for this post (and thanks to Mrs. Chicken for sending me here). We've been married ten years, and its been good for probably six of those. Your last line really brought it home for me. I told him last night that if he were to walk out the door that second, it would be a relief. And I meant it. Then. But thanks for the second thoughts. Thank you for this post (and thanks to Mrs. Chicken for sending me here). We’ve been married ten years, and its been good for probably six of those. Your last line really brought it home for me. I told him last night that if he were to walk out the door that second, it would be a relief. And I meant it. Then. But thanks for the second thoughts.

]]> By: Brenda http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2911 Brenda Wed, 12 Mar 2008 13:20:25 +0000 http://www.temporarilyme.com/2008/03/11/from-behind-the-facade/#comment-2911 oh hon I'm so sorry. Marriage is very hard work. I've been married now for 8.5 years, and though we've had a few rough patches here and there, we've done considerably well. First off, I'm very determined to make it work. I don't agree with divorce, so for me the only reason I would ever leave the marriage would be if he physically hurt me or the kids. Secondly, it's a lot of sacrifice and compromise. You really have to let go of your pride. It's not about being "right" all the time...but about coming to a solution you both can live with. We had a huge arguement the other day about the toaster oven on the kitchen counter. I want it there, he doesn't. Is it really that important? Is arguing all day over a toaster oven really that important in the grand scheme of things...just to prove I'm right? Not really. I gave up my pride, put the toaster oven in the basement, and let it go. All about sacrifices. Thirdly, it's also about communication. I've learned that without good communication a marriage will fail. Both partners must be willing to talk and discuss what's wrong, what's bothering them, etc. Hubby and I talk every day about our days, our nights, the kids, everything. I'm by no means an expert...we've had our share of hard times (when I went through PPD twice....and infertility...that put a huge strain on our relationship.) But we were able to work it out because we love each other. I can't imagine life without him. You are so brave for talking about this. I really hope things work out. I'm sure you two will come up with a solution and make it work. I'm praying for you. <em>Brenda's last blog post..<a href='http://pookeybear.blogspot.com/2008/03/honestlyi-swear.html'>Honestly....I swear</a></em> oh hon I’m so sorry. Marriage is very hard work. I’ve been married now for 8.5 years, and though we’ve had a few rough patches here and there, we’ve done considerably well.
First off, I’m very determined to make it work. I don’t agree with divorce, so for me the only reason I would ever leave the marriage would be if he physically hurt me or the kids.
Secondly, it’s a lot of sacrifice and compromise. You really have to let go of your pride. It’s not about being “right” all the time…but about coming to a solution you both can live with. We had a huge arguement the other day about the toaster oven on the kitchen counter. I want it there, he doesn’t. Is it really that important? Is arguing all day over a toaster oven really that important in the grand scheme of things…just to prove I’m right? Not really. I gave up my pride, put the toaster oven in the basement, and let it go. All about sacrifices.
Thirdly, it’s also about communication. I’ve learned that without good communication a marriage will fail. Both partners must be willing to talk and discuss what’s wrong, what’s bothering them, etc. Hubby and I talk every day about our days, our nights, the kids, everything.

I’m by no means an expert…we’ve had our share of hard times (when I went through PPD twice….and infertility…that put a huge strain on our relationship.) But we were able to work it out because we love each other. I can’t imagine life without him.

You are so brave for talking about this. I really hope things work out. I’m sure you two will come up with a solution and make it work. I’m praying for you.

Brenda’s last blog post..Honestly….I swear

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