March 19th, 2008
“Who’s there?” questioned a stout little boy. His hair was cut short, his pants torn and dirty.
“Who’s there?” he questioned again, slightly irritated.
My brother, just three at the time, and I, four, just stood there, silent. We had, moments ago, stepped foot in our new home and were in the midst of investigating our tiny backyard as this boy approached, trying precariously to catch a glimpse of us through the wooden fence as he perched himself atop the bottom brace.
“You new here?” The voice asked, “Hey, hey you. You gonna answer me?”
Another voice in the distance called for the boy to get off the fence, mom and dad wanted him to come in the house.
“FUCK OFF!” the young boy yelled.
The first time a swear word had befell on my ears.
I was befuddled; I stared at my brother, scared. This young boy - my age, had said something with such hatred in his voice. I was a little anxious for our first face to face. Seemingly unbiased to this recent confrontation, my brother reached for the sagging pull string attached to the rusty latch and pulled. The gate swung open revealing the stout little boy and his, presumably, older sister running towards us.
“You’re the new kids?” she questioned as she approached, appearing to be less hostile then her brother, I nodded.
“What does fuck mean?” My brother questioned.
“It’s a bad word, but fun to say - it’s like go away!” stated the boy.
And so it began.
From that day on, I’ve had somewhat of a trucker’s mouth.
I was given a daily suspension in grade one for yelling “FUCK OFF!” on the playground - which also resulted in a parent/teacher conference. Not cool.
At ten years old, I was given another suspension from day camp for telling the camp leader to “Go Fuck Yourself“.
My mouth has been relentlessly getting me in trouble.
As you may have noticed while reading this blog, I tend to swear a fair bit. But one thing that I’ve never really understood - probably because of my parent’s influence - is why people use fake swear words to substitute the words they really mean.
Facking, freaking (or typing f*$king) is just as bad as saying Fucking in my books. When it’s said with the full intention of the actual word, why not just use the real word? I completely understand not wanting to use the off-colour language in front of children, but words that allude to the swear that you’re intentionally not saying are not any better, are they?
For myself, if I’m in a situation / writing something / or talking to someone that I know swearing is not acceptable, I will intentional not swear, but I will not use words that allude to the ones I am avoiding using since they are not justifiably any better then the intended curse word.
Just my prerogative.
I’m curious though, and I’m not pointing fingers nor intending to belittle those that use these “fake” curse words, or type out the word with &@(*&, I really am just curious as to why this action is considered better.
Thanks Lexi for the comic!
For the most part, I’ve noticed in our vast blogging communities that the majority are of age. Adults. We all know the considerable array of curse words that exist: some choose not to swear at all - which is completely fine by me - some swear and have no qualms about it, while some seem to be on the fence. They intend to swear but choose not to by insinuating what word they would use had they chose to use it.
Is it fear of offending readers? Upbringing? Social circles?
Colour me fucking confused.
Hahahahah, oh Sam - I loved this post!!
I’ve never understood the fake curse words either. Especially since when I HAVE used them in front of my son, the immediate question is “mom, what does frick mean?”
Fuck he understands and knows to ignore. *evil horrible mother grin*
Miss Britt’s last blog post..The Other Brother
March 19th, 2008 at 10:35 am
Miss Britt: I was always taught that swearing was for adults (even though we did it all the time when they weren’t around) and I knew not to say it in front of them.
I picked up on the fake swears for a while and my stepdad told me I sounded like an idiot and because it’s not the REAL swear, it doesn’t make it any different … I’ve kinda gone by that since. LOL If I tell my brother to F-OFF it’s exactly the same as FUCK OFF so I would get grounded anyway. Ha!
March 19th, 2008 at 10:44 am
Hear, hear! I don’t get this either.
My BIL’s girlfriend actually censors herself when she’s talking. Not using “fake” words, either…she just drops the word. I.e. “he such a mother—-ing joke”, inserting a kinda ugh-gagging sound that’s really hard to describe.
It drives me BONKERS. If you don’t want to cuss in front of your kid, don’t bother leaving the space for the word!
Lexi’s last blog post..Holy Crap!
March 19th, 2008 at 10:46 am
Lexi: oh I hate that too - or when people say “Bleep”, “Bleeping” - I wanna just say “USE THE FUCKING WORD ALREADY!”
Mike and I are horrible, HORRIBLE for swearing in front of Carter. Luckily he hasn’t picked it up. Yet. *touch wood*
March 19th, 2008 at 10:49 am
P.S. This comic covers it perfectly.
I love Get Fuzzy.
Lexi’s last blog post..Holy Crap!
March 19th, 2008 at 11:01 am
I censor myself around the girls, training myself to either not swear at all or substitute words to keep from having a three year old who swears.
In writing, I’ll sometimes write the word out, but often will type it as f*ck, only because to some people, seeing the word fully spelled has a stronger, more visceral, reaction. Yes, they know the word I’m typing, but seeing it partially “blurred” out is somehow not as offensive to them.
Christina’s last blog post..Recycled, And Yet Brand New
March 19th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
I swear on my blog, I swear in real life, I pretty much try to be nice in front of those who either don’t cuss or would be offended. In comment sections, I watch myself because I don’t want to offend someone who might get offended. Why? I don’t know. And though most of us are of age, some might not be. And I don’t want to be the one that the mother sees and uses as the example of a “potty mouth”. I am a bit strange that way. And as Christina above me says, “It seems a little less offensive” to those who don’t speak in such a way. Of course who am I to give a flying fuck about what others say about me.
justmylife’s last blog post..It’s Raining Again……
March 19th, 2008 at 3:33 pm
In the very beginning I swore. Then I got weird google hits from the word Fuck.
so I started using an asterisk for all curse words.
Then I only used an asteisk for the f-word.
Now I’m back to the asterisk because my MIL reads and has tender eyes.
In real life, I’m really trying to stop swearing. It’s not going so well.
Jennifer’s last blog post..When I Need Expert Advice, I Consult Mah Peeps on Teh Internetz
March 19th, 2008 at 4:11 pm
They do it for the same reason that tv stations bleep out bad words. We know it’s there, we can *almost* hear it, but somehow it’s not all there if you bleep it.
I do sometimes say f*ck like that, but more often I say *fuck* like that. It really just depends on my mood. If “oh crud” won’t do, but “fuck” is a little strong, then I might say “f*ck”.
March 19th, 2008 at 4:56 pm
I love swearing. I’ve done a couple of blog posts about it, particularly my favorite word of all time, Fuck. Cuss words are “sentence enhancers” and make my lips tingle with the spiciness of the conversation!
Angie’s last blog post..Future of America
March 19th, 2008 at 10:22 pm
No offense taken….or given. I personally hate swearing. I feel it makes people seem less educated than they really are.
I don’t swear because I’m a Christian and it’s not a good example. I don’t swear in front of my children (EVER) and rarely ever swear in real life or on blogland. I do sometimes use the fake words….simply because saying the real words offends me. I don’t really feel it’s the same thing. It’s ok for a child to say “oh crap” but not the real word you mean. I always taught Ryan to say “Oh pickles”.
Now he says a few choice words he’s picked up from television shows. It really drives me insane. I have given him time outs and even washed his mouth out with soap. (it’s the D word). I do not tolerate bad language in my house at all.
Like I said, just a personal thing. I don’t really understand at all why people swear at all. What’s the purpose?
Oh….and Carter may be kinda young yet to pick up on the words…but trust me…he will someday…and it will most likely be in the most inopportune, embarrassing place!! (oh..and you’ll get the “but YOU say it!”)
I hope I’m not coming off as rude. I don’t mind others swearing….I wouldn’t stop reading your blog for it. I just skip over the words. LOL I just don’t swear myself for my own personal reasons.
Brenda’s last blog post..6 word memoir
March 20th, 2008 at 8:26 am
Christina: Good point Christina.
I’ve really been working HARD on not swearing around Carter, I’m just so used to it that it just slips out sometimes. Though I can’t help but laugh when I hear a child swear (since I have the sense of humour of a 12 year old boy) I really don’t want my child going to school and behaving the way I did.
justmylife: Yeah, I watch myself on comments as well because THAT’S their personal space and I don’t wanna abuse it - unless of course I know they have a potty mouth like I do. LOL
Jennifer: I think I’ve only got hits with the word fuck from people looking for fuckme.com…. so weird. Oh, I understand the MIL part. That’s the LAST topic you need to cover at Easter dinner - why do you insist on swearing so much on your blog? LOL!!
Natalie: LOVE your explanation!! You had me laughing so hard! I don’t know why I found it so funny though.
Angie: LOL Angie!!
Brenda: You don’t come off as rude AT ALL Brenda. I appreciate you’re honesty. I always have!
March 20th, 2008 at 9:23 am
HAHAHA! LOVE the cartoon. I do this. I use frick and friggin and freakin and f-ing on the blog and in real life. I also just use fuck on the blog and in life, but not often.
I never acclimated to using this word much, though it is my favorite cuss word. My mom thought it wasn’t ladylike and completely inappropriate at all times and places and that affected me.
I want to think I am intelligent enough to express myself without resorting to cussing, but sometimes there is no other word for something than “fuck.”
Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritas’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday - Sugar and Shark
March 20th, 2008 at 9:51 am
I never sware on my blog. The reason? I know my mom reads, and would be offended.
I had a total trucker’s mouth for awhile. It got to the point that when I started my “career” it was really unprofessional because I didn’t even notice myself using certain words. So, I made a point of cutting out profanity.
But … I’m not the type of person to say the word “fudge” and all of that.
The funny thing is that I never sware at work because I think it’s unprofessional. But, one time I was FURIOUS at a service provider and I said to my boss (our VP) “they are so fucking incompetent”. He had never heard me sware. It was very effective at that moment.
My point is just that for me I try to only sware when absolutely necessary. And when fighting with my husband!
LD’s last blog post..A Little Embarrassed
March 23rd, 2008 at 12:19 pm
Almost every time I drop an f-bomb on my blog, I get an e-mail from someone about it. So, I try to keep it in check. But sometimes, there’s nothing more gratifying than letting those words fly! And a fake word or an asterisk just isn’t going to cut it.
Leslie’s last blog post..My Radical Little Feminist
March 23rd, 2008 at 5:05 pm
Amy: I hear ya! Sometimes it just expresses what you’re trying to say so much more! Haha
LD: You know, I would probably curb my swearing if I found out that I had family reading. I have an image I have to uphold (Ha!).
Leslie: Seriously? People call you on your swearing? I’ve never ever had that. Though, if I did I’d probably tell them where to go. LOL
March 24th, 2008 at 10:27 am
Holy fuck, that comic is fuckin’ hilarious!
Ainsley’s last blog post..Haiku Friday
March 24th, 2008 at 7:21 pm