March 25th, 2008
I am the product of, what I believe to be, was a one night stand or very short dating stint between my parents. I believe that my parents married because they were both of Catholic faith (Ha!) and their parents would have cast Satanic spells and banished them to the Gates of Hell had they not married before my birth. That they did; about 35 days before I arrived.
Throughout my pre-teen years I was hateful and very vengeful towards my little brother, as most pre-teen girls are. We would fight and I would venomously utter The Words. The Words that just about every teen does to a sibling: I wish you were never born! or I would tell him: You were mistake! To which he would run to my mom and tattle that I had said such hurtful and harsh things to a very impressionable little boy.
One particular instance we were fighting in the car and I utter The Words. As we arrived to a stop light my mom slowly turned around and glared at me. “No Samantha, you were a mistake.” to which my brother beamed ear to ear.
I was defeated.
The Words would never scar that boy again because now he had ammunition: The Truth.
I don’ t blame my mother for what she said, hell if the time comes I just may do the same to Carter as he torments his sibling one day (even though it’s entirely untrue. Both my children were planned and are angels in Satan’s The Good Lord’s service.) I deserved that quip, I’m just surprised that she thought of it so quickly. My mom is not one for witty comebacks, that’s for sure. To this day, I actually find it kinda humourous.
During a visit with my mom a little while back we were talking about my choice of contraceptive - okay a while back seeing as I am now about the size of a house, only a bit smaller - (Because that’s what adult women do with their mothers. As apposed to teenagers who sneak over to The Clinic at lunch and load up on flavoured condoms and giggle as they return to school with them in their clutches feeling so sneaky and devious.) She was a little shocked when I told her that I had opted for the IUD.
“An IUD?” she announced to a FULL food court, looking around she lowered her tone as if to share a deep dark secret, “I had one of those when I got pregnant with your brother. It failed.”
A smile spread across my face.
“What?” she hissed.
“So he was a mistake too?” I questioned.
“Oh Samantha, neither of you were a mistake.”
Typical parental response. Kinda like I don’t have a favourite I love you both equally.
Bullshit.
“Oh Mom.” I sighed, over the years I’ve put the pieces together. I got it all now. “Remember how I used to tell my brother he was a mistake whenever I’d get mad at him and you would tell me that I was, in fact, the mistake. Always stealing my thunder, and the fact is we’re BOTH mistakes.” I laughed.
She stared at me. Daggers in her eyes. Not quite finding the humour.
Laughing to myself, I didn’t pursue it any further. Still haven’t to this day. I like my limbs intact, thanks.
And even though we’re far beyond the fighting and hurtful name calling we used to exhibit. I’m holding on to this one to drop in his lap sometime.
Though I don’t know that “Dude! We’re BOTH mistakes” is quite as effective.
HA! My brother was a “mistake”. I threw that in his face ONE time. My mother wouldn’t speak to me for DAYS. I’ve never felt so bad in my life.
I have an IUD and like it. I hope it doesn’t fail, though…yikes!
Jennifer’s last blog post..Jon, Tate, and Jennifer Plus 8
March 25th, 2008 at 3:45 pm
Is it bad that I cringed all the way through this post? My son was a surprise! But never a mistake. Ouch. I know you said it doesn’t bother you, but OUCH still.
I’m also overly emotional today, just so you know.
March 25th, 2008 at 4:15 pm
My mother was always very careful to make sure that I know that She Wasn’t Pregnant When She Got Married. Yeah, all 16 year olds I know rush right to the altar.
March 25th, 2008 at 4:44 pm
None of my children were planned, all surprises. I said this one day and was told by a man that no child is a surprise or a mistake, they are all gifts from God. I thought, OK, God SURPRISED me with all of my children.
My brother never told me I was a mistake, he always said I was so ugly that my real family left me on the door step and my mom felt sorry for me and kept me. Now that’s mean!
justmylife’s last blog post..Just a few short rumblings….
March 25th, 2008 at 4:49 pm
I am horrified that your mom told you to your face that you were a mistake!!! Ack, that’s awful, especially when you’re a kid. From one adult to another, maybe it’s an okay admission, like the one about your brother, but Eek!
March 25th, 2008 at 8:16 pm
This post cracked me up! Totally something my grandma would say to my dad and aunts
Mrs. Mustard’s last blog post..Happy Easter!
March 25th, 2008 at 8:24 pm
Ha. I can just imagine that conversation with your mom.
And, the words “mistake” are just horrible. Accident at least sounds like it ended up okay!
March 25th, 2008 at 11:22 pm
Jennifer: I had my IUD for 3 years and LOVED it. I plan on getting another once I have this baby too.
And I don’t really believe in mistakes. I think everything happens for a reason.
Natalie: It wasn’t meant to make you cringe! Sorry!
I think my mom used the term “mistake” only to get back at me for hurting my brother. Maybe a slip of the tongue - but it taught me a lesson…
Shania: Yeah, my mom told me that they were married before they had me for the longest time. The older I got, the more I understood. LOL
justmylife:: God SURPRISED me with all of my children — Hahahahaha! That’s great. Like I said above. I think everything happens for a reason!
What your brother said was mean, but oh so funny. Kids are so cruel.
Shannon: I think she used the term “mistake” more just to teach me how hurtful it can be because I said it to my brother A LOT. It worked then.
Mrs. Mustard: Maybe it’s a Canadian thing? LOL
Lindsay: Oh, you know my mom! She LOVES me to pieces! LOL And she’s just about as blunt as I am sometimes! Ha!
March 26th, 2008 at 8:33 am
That is some very powerful amunition to have up your sleeve! I would savor it for a while…
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March 26th, 2008 at 10:16 am