If you’re following me on twitter, you may have witnessed my breakdown on Friday.
Preparing for a dinner date with Mike, I had to pump some milk for Hudson. He was going to be spending a couple hours at the daycare for a special evening where they have the children and their siblings stay until 10pm for a mini sleepover-like party: friends, pizza and movies in their pj’s.
I was also trying out the new MilkBank Vacuum Storage System for my Parent Bloggers review (check it out here - THERE’S A GIVEAWAY!!) so I got out my pump – which I fuckin’ HATE doing – and managed to get a good six ounces of milk.
I placed the pump on the counter forgetting to use the base on the bottle and before I knew it the whole thing fell over and milk spewed everywhere.
I watched the liquid gold flow along the grout lines in my ceramic tiles as I envisioned myself sucking it up and spitting it back into the bottle; cupping it in my hands and pouring it back in; getting the turkey baster to suck it up.
Even as a tumbleweed of cat hair lodged itself in the travelling liquid I thought – for a millisecond – about just picking it out. Yes, seriously.
Then I was forced to accept defeat. I mean, I couldn’t feed this to my child anymore.
But it’s not like he’s an infant anymore. A little dirt won’t hurt, right?
I grabbed a stack of paper towels to clean up the mess.
I could wring the paper towel out into the bottle maybe…
I took a deep breath and covered it, watching it slowly seep through – the tears started.
I cried over split milk.
And I’d do it again.
** I’m giving away a MilkBank Vacuum Storage System over at my review site, Glamorous Geek. Please stop by and leave a comment for your chance to win one of your own! Giveaway ends Saturday at 12pm EST. **
:::
Grace in Small Things: Part 10 of 365
- Sick babies – only because they’re both SLEEPING
- Sunshine on a cold brisk winter’s morning
- Finding my car parked at the end of the driveway when, for a brief moment I thought it was stolen
- Finishing Maggie‘s new site Violence UnSilenced
- A stolen moment of cuddles with my very active three year old
{ 23 comments }
You are SO right about the ‘liquid gold’ description. Anna had nothing but boob juice for her first 6 months (plus the sweet taters) and that goodness was handled like diamonds.
Totally acceptable to have a complete meltdown over a few ounces.
Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s last blog post..Doing Actual Stuff
@Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing], I knew you would understand. LOL
Liquid gold is the perfect description. Any mother who’s been there knows a breakdown was justified.
maggie, dammit´s last blog post..Cary’s Story
@maggie, dammit, though it may be justified, still feels silly. If it happened again, I’m sure I’d have a very similar reaction – right down to eating chocolate. Maybe just more of it.
since i couldn’t pump…well, at least not without purple nipples and bloodshed…my kids always got formula in a pinch so i can’t say i completely understand but i imagine if i were a pumper…that the milk would totally be liquid gold and i’d totally have a complete meltdown and chocolate probably would have made me feel a little better. heh.
@ali, I bet you could still relate. How about preping a bottle late at night. Baby’s screaming and you spill it and have to start all over? NOt as traumatic, but along the same lines.
i’ve been there… i can remember literally lying on the floor sobbing when i reached over an 8 oz bottle of freshly pumped mild and knocked the whole thing into a sink full of dirty dishes.
i have about 100 oz of frozen breastmilk in my freezer that i no longer need but am unable to part with. i’m sure it’s bad by now, but i just can’t do it :-/
MommyNamedApril´s last blog post..Beer is So Good.
@MommyNamedApril, I’d totally hold on to old milk too. It’s so hard to even THINK about throwing it out.
See? CommentLuv works. I follow a boob-related CommentLuv link from the Bloggess, end up here, and now I know how valuable breast milk can be.
[Cue "The More You Know" graphic]
Johnny Truant´s last blog post..Apparently my baby is having a stroke
@Johnny Truant, Bwahahahaha. Aren’t you glad you followed?
I would have done the same thing. With a lot more exclamation points and cuss words.
PS This is one of the best titles for a post I’ve seen in a long time. I was all “Whaa?” and laughed out loud. Then I felt like a shit for laughing before I read the post *after* I had read the post (did that make any sense?).
Sammanthia´s last blog post..Random Tuesday Thoughts: Part I
@Sammanthia, Oh. There were TONS of curse words. TONS.
And you’re allowed to laugh, I’m laughing about it already.
oh, man this made me all teary!
flutter´s last blog post..It’s personal
@flutter, *hugs*
Over two years ago, one hectic night, I left an entire bottle (full to the top!) on the counter after spending time pumping to get ahead. No one understood how upset I was the next day when I found it sitting there. But I know you understand. Sorry sweetie, but your right Hudson just wants your smile and sweet potatoes.
And Violence Unsilenced – absolutely brilliant.
katie ~ motherbumper´s last blog post..call of the bliss
@katie ~ motherbumper, OMG. I think I would die. I think I would even wonder if I could get away with feeding that to the baby still. LOL
And thanks for the props about Violence UnSilenced. Maggie’s brainchild is so freaking fabulous I couldn’t NOT be apart of it.
There was a point in time (in my admittedly WAY short breastfeeding career) when I wanted to wake the kid UP so I could just get him to FINISH the damned bottle.
Those leftover ounce and a half’s used to just decimate me.
Liquid gold, indeed.
daysgoby´s last blog post..somedays, it’s like pulling teeth
@daysgoby, Oh, I’ve so done that too. Fill that kid right to the brim so none of the milk goes to waste. I bet if I picked him up after he would have ruptured like a water ballon. lol
I’ve never breast fed but I know from my sister that pumping is a bitch and losing all that milk would send most women to tears. I’d have cried too!
sizzle´s last blog post..Is this Kindergarten Cop?
I would have cried – easily. But then when I’m breastfeeding – *anything* makes me cry anyway! This would have reduced me to a jibbering wreck and I hated expressing too..
Bless you – I did see your tweets and I think I answered. I hope I did anyway – cos I meant to x
It absolutely is liquid gold – poor you x
nutty mummy´s last blog post..Absence
oh man…. That’s awful. I’m SORRY! Hugs. And, “Don’t cry over spilled milk” is my f*ing mantra now. Since my Rascal is a ransacker. I’m constantly cleaning up spilled milk and any crumb of food I give him.
Haley-O´s last blog post..Motherhood From Down Here On My Knees
well, I was right there with you on Twitter, and I still shudder thinking about your trauma! I haaaaaated pumping, too.
It’s not spilled milk, it’s liquid gold!
heather…´s last blog post..Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One
OMG! OMG!! OMG!!! I pumped and lost milk this way when my son was younger and I too did cry b/c it’s not as easy to pump milk as people might think. I mean, I swear once I got those measly 2oz, he was starting to wean himself so my milk was drying up no matter how much I pumped, out of me that my boobs didn’t have anymore in them. Now I’m extra cautious w/my Liquid Gold now that I’m nursing/pumping with my daughter but I’m nervous 100% of the time when it comes to transferring the milk to the baggies from the pump.
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