![[UPDATED!] The Tale of a Loving Marriage and Shopping. Alternative Title: Who the Hell am I Kidding?](http://temporarilyme.com/wp-content/plugins/ttftitles/cache/18eacb632649f559e59e7ce172541b00.png)
It’s not often anymore that I get the urge to organize / redecorate but when it hits, it’s with a vengeance. Like when I have the thought that I want something done I have to see immediate results or I obsess about it until it’s done; and it can’t be done in stages, it’s all or nothing.
You can imagine how happy this makes my husband.
I’ve been telling him for weeks now how we need more storage in the living room. I insisted on an Expedit shelf from Ikea and he was all “I’m not buying that fuckin’ garbage. I HATE IKEA! Blargh!”, and I was all, “Fuck you, I’m getting the shelf.”
So last night we headed out to Ikea to get my new shelf and baskets for the movies and kids’ toys. Mike was all, “What’s with you and fuckin’ baskets?”, and I was all, “Fuck you, I’m getting baskets.”
I loaded up the cart with six of those $24.99 grass baskets and Mike was all, “Fuckin’ baskets.”, and I was all, “Fuck you, I’m getting the baskets. So suckit.”
Yes, that’s how we talk to each other all the time. It’s fun.
As we loaded the stuff in the car, I checked his inability to stack boxes handy work at tying down the hatch of the car. I kindly mentioned, “That’s not gonna fuckin’ stay idiot. Those boxes are going to fuckin’ fall out all over the damn road.”, and he was all “Fuck off, it’s fine. Just shut up and get in the car.”
We began driving home. The first red light, wouldn’t you know 2 of the three boxes fell from the back into traffic. Thankfully there was no one close behind us that I could send Mike out into traffic to gather them while I bitched from my passenger seat we could gather the boxes to the side of the road.
I was all, “See, I fuckin’ told you. You never listen to me and see what happens.”, to which he replied, “Fuck off already. Jesus. Do you ever shut the hell up?” then I said, “Jesus is dead so I’m pretty sure he’s quiet.”
Edited to Add: And I mean Jesus is dead in his human-life form. Of course.
Then I got the look. You know the one? Where if you say one more word their head is going to impode? So I walked away and let him deal with his colossal fuck up mistake because no one wants that shit all over their car.
Now I have this shelf and about 250 DVD’s that need a new home and the baskets – yes, those fuckn’ baskets – aren’t cutting it.
The picture is not all that clear, but what I am showing you is stacked DVD’s crammed into a beautiful $24.99 basket which I pretty much fought for and it’s not working the way I want.
Not to mention – do you see Teh Awesomness that is in this collection? Cobra? Cliffhanger? Booty Call? Catwoman? Dude’s got issues.
My movies that can be seen here: Dazed and Confused, Benny and Joon, Chasing Amy, Empire Records…Â good right? I rest my case.
Edited to add: Mike read the post and insisted I share with you the fact that he does own some rather excellent movies I just pointed out the shitty ones – which is true because how fun is it making fun of good stuff?
So. I have four baskets FULL to the tits with DVD’s and more that need a home.
I don’t want them just ‘out’ because I hate – with the passion of a thousand suns – the look of row upon row of DVD’s.
That’s just me. Fucked in the head and difficult.
So when Mike gets home I have to try and convince him that he should put all his movies into a CD book and store the cases in boxes in the basement. That is unless you, Oh Wise Internets, have another storage idea for me.
Because otherwise, I fear he may rip off my head and shit down my throat.
I wouldn’t put it past him. Have you seen the way he talks to me!?
Avitable says:
Put the movies into a CD wallet? That’s fuckin’ sacrilege, that’s what that is.
Just buy a nice DVD shelf, or a unit that has drawers that can close.
And I hate IKEA too. Fuckin’ baskets.
Avitable´s last blog post..General anesthesia
samantha Reply:
March 27th, 2009 at 6:38 pm
@Avitable, are DVD caswes like trophies or something? I don’t for the life of me understand why it’s soooo important to see them. Pretty pictures help you guys tell what the movie is?
March 27th, 2009 at 5:08 pm
Chibi Jeebs says:
Tell me you’re not slamming Dazed ‘n Confused and Empire Records!
I don’t know what to tell you about your DVD situation. We currently went from having the DVD’s in wicker baskets that fit under the coffee table (out of sight! tidy! not an eye sore!), to media stands that flank the new TV stand (hate the new set-up, but the bigger TV doesn’t fit in my old stand). The colourful spines of the cases make the living room seem… chaotic, or something.
Of course, The Man-Thing just rolls his eyes at me and claims to not “get” decorating. Fucker.
Chibi Jeebs´s last blog post..When "mine" becomes "ours"
samantha Reply:
March 27th, 2009 at 6:39 pm
@Chibi Jeebs, no, no. No slamming those – those are my picks! GOOD movies. LOL
Yes! DVD’s make it seems completely chaotic. I hate seeing so many colours everywhere! The toys, the movies.. it’s enough to give me a seizure.
March 27th, 2009 at 5:10 pm
Lynn (Walking With Scissors) says:
Ah, but the DVD wallet (ours is a big, huge binder) just takes up so much less room! Think of how much other crap you could stick into those fuckin’ baskets with the DVDs out of the way!
Lynn (Walking With Scissors)´s last blog post..The Honeymoon is Over…
samantha Reply:
March 27th, 2009 at 6:40 pm
@Lynn (Walking With Scissors), agreed! See, the binder would be a MUCH better option. One teeny tiny space on teh shelf rather than 4 huge baskets full.
March 27th, 2009 at 5:46 pm
daysgoby says:
Those are cute fuckin’ baskets!
daysgoby´s last blog post..thursday night commercial, scene four
samantha Reply:
March 27th, 2009 at 6:41 pm
@daysgoby, why thank you! I’m glad you like my fuckin’ baskets. I am quite happy with them too.
March 27th, 2009 at 6:10 pm
kristi crazy says:
Wow..I never knew baskets were that expensive! I go to Dollar General and pay like $6 !!
kristi crazy´s last blog post..Kandace’s babies
March 27th, 2009 at 8:24 pm
Sammanthia says:
I just bought the kids a papason chair and an ottoman- the ottoman isn’t really just any ottoman but a… get this… wait for it… are you ready… A STORAGE OTTOMAN! I wept tears of joy when I brought it home and realized just how much shit I could put inside.
I aso have a bookcase with bins that I bought at Target that I use to store movies and books. Oh wait.You live in Canada. Never mind.
Sammanthia´s last blog post..Spin Cycle: Licensed To Mentally Ill
March 27th, 2009 at 9:01 pm
flutter says:
those fuckin baskets are fucking boss, even if they are IKEA
flutter´s last blog post..Protected: The infection of loneliness (fiction) (email me for the password fluttercrafts at gmail dot com)
March 28th, 2009 at 2:06 am
Vic says:
How about you store the dvds and their boxes in the basement. Hell, you could even store Mike down there! lol
Vic´s last blog post..Untitled No.1
March 28th, 2009 at 8:05 am
justmylife says:
I want some of the fuckin baskets! I currently house my DVDs in a wood box next to the TV. They are still in their cases. I think the binder is a great idea
justmylife´s last blog post..And yet I still feel like doodie!
March 28th, 2009 at 8:57 am
Karen Sugarpants says:
i’m with mike on this one. baskets are ghey.
Karen Sugarpants´s last blog post..Not Being My Mother
March 28th, 2009 at 10:09 am
Lynn says:
Hysterical! I’m loving the fact that 2 out of the 3 improperly loaded baskets fell out into traffic. This sounds like the best shopping trip ever!
I vote for digitizing all the movies onto one tiny microchip.
Lynn´s last blog post..The Bane of my Existence
March 28th, 2009 at 6:17 pm
ali says:
we have a bunch of those cd binder things. they are amazing. it’s also so much easier to find the one you are looking for. we have one for kids. one for old stuff. one for new stuff. it’s GREAT. and so much less cluttered than having them all out on display.
March 30th, 2009 at 10:55 am
WM says:
I gots nothing, because I my friend am having the same problem. We have the rows of DVDS and it’s bugging the shit out of me.
Hey you feel like sending those baskets to Seattle ?
WM´s last blog post..Look Mom, Barbie sprained her Crotch
March 30th, 2009 at 12:20 pm
sizzle says:
I hate the look of cds stacked so I bought four binders and put all my cds in alpha order in them then stored the cases in my storage unit. LOVE IT. Highly recommend it.
sizzle´s last blog post..Happy Day Is On Its Way
March 30th, 2009 at 3:44 pm
Miss Britt says:
Clearly what you need is MORE baskets.
And shelves on the wall. With more baskets on them.
Miss Britt´s last blog post..No Title In The World Will Make This Less Mundane
March 30th, 2009 at 7:10 pm
nic says:
this is the funniest fucking thing i have read in a looooong time! i mean, i’m sorry about the baskets not working out and all, but goddamn this was funny to read.
so thanks for that.
nic´s last blog post..i swear, i found him like this
March 31st, 2009 at 9:13 am