Things are coming together. I think I’m getting my groove back. You may still occasionally find me huddled in the deep recesses of my new! garage! hiding with my raspberry vodka, but for the most part I think my shit is coming together.
I fell asleep before the kids were in Mike’s recliner on Saturday night; the most sleep I’ve had since prior to BlogHer. Holy shit! Was that three weeks ago already? I can’t believe how fast time has been flying. Two weeks and summer will unofficially be over as the kids (not mine, but yours) are gearing up to go back to school.
The school which Carter will eventually be attending is a stone’s throw from my new house. Seriously, *I* could hit it with a stone. I can see it from my front windows. I’ve been contemplating – again – the idea of sending Carter to Junior Kindergarten. I mean, the daycare has a program there and I only have to suffer through one pick up and drop off, but the money….even the mere two hundred dollars we could save would be beneficial (especially when daycare fees are the same as our mortgage. 1840 big ones. Per month. Yes, that’s right.)
The Incident in Carter’s class has somewhat dissipated as the offending person has been removed from the daycare. They will not be returning. Ever.
Thanks to you and your comments, I realize that you’re right. I didn’t fail my child but the person in question failed me. I can’t help but still feel that twinge of guilt in my pit of my stomach: I should be home caring for my children. I should be their primary caregiver. I don’t know that that will ever go away.
Aside from that, I feel a little more comfortable about the whole thing. Still uneasy, but better.
Except. By process of elimination I am fairly certain I know who the victim was (is).
My heart breaks for them. Their whole family. I wish nothing more than to be able to do something for them. To take away that pain and worry and heartache they are certainly feeling.
CAS has someone going to the daycare to talk to children whose parents have concerns and aren’t sure how to broach the subject with their child. I am leary about having a stranger talk to Carter about such a sensitive issue. We’ve had a number of discussions which lead me to believe that he understands what private parts are and who can touch you. He hasn’t exhibited any signs which we’ve been instructed to look out for, so we’re pretty confident that we’re on the right path to educating him. But! I worry that I’m not taking every aveune available to us by declining the interviews at the daycare.
Can we ever win this mental battle of Parent Guilt?
P.S. There’s pictures coming. I swear. I have to try and locate my camera.
P.S. Who’s coming to help strip wallpaper and paint? I have a pool and margarita mix!
{ 8 comments }
OH the WALLPAPER.
Gahd.
WALLPAPER.
I’d rather leap off a cliff and not know where I’m going to land, than remove wallpaper again. Especially stuff that is stuck on from the 60s… which was my house last year when we moved in. All I can say for a pointer is hella hot water, fabric softener and let it sit – sit for a while and then it will fall off – but it has to be soaked for a long time, not just quick sprays – put that stuff on there and get it all sloppy – wait 15+ minutes and it should be good.
I’d totally come swim though!
Wish I was closer or I’d come help you do that schtuff… I don’t mind it, as long as alcohol is involved.
How about a guest room? Do you have a guest room? Cuz I will totally be there. I just don’t do couches, you know.
First, I don’t know what rock I have been under, but I somehow missed everything about the incident. I am so sorry that something like this is hitting so close to home for you! IN NO WAY have you failed, so please please please DONT think that! Unfortunately, evil is out there and try as we may, we cannot lock our children away from it all. I’m not saying that bad things happen and so what, so please don’t think that! I’m simply saying that we, as parents, do the best that we can do for our kids. We pick where we place them (daycare, in home, etc) and we worry. The best we can do is be vigilant and keep doing our best. In no way does this compare, but this summer I found out that the person I was entrusting with my kids (at the time 1 and 3) was placing the 1 year old in her Ford excursion… in the CARGO area. She was strapped into a carseat but the carseat was NOT attached to the vehicle at all and her carseat kept falling over! AND, keep in mind that here in AZ it was over 100 degrees too in the summer and NO air vents in the cargo area of a vehicle, let alone the thought of IF an accident had happened! No, she no longer goes there and YES, I too feel soooooo often that I would just love to be home with the kids as I can give them the best care possible, but it just isn’t a possibilty. So we do the best we can. So keep doing your best! Now, about the walpaper, never done it before, but did you say margaritas? I’m in! HAHAHAHA!
I am SO THERE.
So, that rock Patty was visiting? Clearly I was with her. (Hi Patty! Good to see you again! Under-a-Rockapooloza-’09!) I missed everything about it, too, so I am going to have to catch up.
What I *will* say is a string of stunned expletives. Daycare is THAT EXPENSIVE???! Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaang. What the H happened to the days that I lived, babysitting kids all night and into the morning for about $10. $20, if they “paid well.” WTF? I WANT A DO OVER. I could have financed college AND grad school AND my Ph.D. Hugs, girl. Hoo, that makes my stomach hurt.
Good to hear I’m not the only one who was totally hiding under a rock! And YES, daycare IS that expensive! I also pay in the 4 digits per month, it hurts so bad (my heart and pocketbook) to work a month and 1/2 of my pay goes towards daycare! If I had some other way to make that other 1/2 without taking my babies to daycare, I would SOOOO be there!!! How I would treasure spending the days with them!
God, this just makes me sick to think about. Those poor people.
And yes, I’ll be right over for swimming, margaritas and wallpaper stripping. Can we do the margaritas first??
Just wanted to swing by and send you more love. *squishy hugs*
P.S. You are a good mama, no doubt about it. <3
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